tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9684236.post1256761299397421666..comments2023-10-16T06:10:24.969-04:00Comments on Julie Unplugged: On being a motherAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00088119765077193302noreply@blogger.comBlogger14125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9684236.post-22806734812752824722009-05-12T15:31:00.000-04:002009-05-12T15:31:00.000-04:00This is beautiful. And so refreshing to read in a...This is beautiful. And so refreshing to read in a time when children are considered burdens and motherhood has been deemed "good enough" if you just manage your children instead of training and loving them into who they are meant to be, nanny them with the television, and medicate them if they get to rambunctious. I hope, aspire, will work, to be the type of mother you so love being.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04156717367536404365noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9684236.post-35064985822722589712009-04-28T14:27:00.000-04:002009-04-28T14:27:00.000-04:00What a beautiful post. There's so much that can b...What a beautiful post. There's so much that can be said about motherhood, but what I owe to my five daughters is huge; I tremble to think what I might have been without them to guide me. What I find most appalling about the show (I didn't see it myself so going on the description) is the fact that mothers would go on national television and talk about their children in such a manner, as if they're lesser people. For me, that is the height of disrespect and a total betrayal of your child's human dignity. I'm probably reading more into it than was actually there, but when I here people complain about their children, that's where my thoughts run.Searching For My Willoughbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03350927584173570044noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9684236.post-85366503844149440162009-04-28T05:47:00.000-04:002009-04-28T05:47:00.000-04:00found your blog from Susanne at Meditative Meander...found your blog from Susanne at Meditative Meanderings - so pleased I have read it. You have written this beautifully - I have had rather a bee in my bonnet about 'choices' recently - people do seem to forget that they can choose to focus on the positives or the negatives - just as they chose (in the majority of cases) to enact behaviour that enabled a fabulous creation to be born. Thank you for such a great uplift!Jane D.https://www.blogger.com/profile/02571647840432446028noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9684236.post-25613711045516169132009-04-28T04:59:00.000-04:002009-04-28T04:59:00.000-04:00hear, hear! good on ya julie -and good on your ki...hear, hear! good on ya julie -and good on your kids. minus the sleeping together thing i'm with ya!Heidi Reneehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01769414906479026143noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9684236.post-6950673411613777382009-04-28T00:54:00.000-04:002009-04-28T00:54:00.000-04:00I found my way here because of lostcheerio, and th...I found my way here because of lostcheerio, and this post got me thinking enough to come back and reply.<br /><br />I didn't see Oprah, so I can't speak directly about that, but I am a mom and certainly have feelings there! I know I'd never go on TV and complain about my son. I make sure every day to tell him how I love him. Even when I'm completely ticked off I take a breath and remind him that I love him even when I'm angry.<br /><br />But I think it would be helpful to ask why these women are so angry and bitter about their children. Surely they actually love their children, but they appear to be unable to face the reality of their lives or they had unrealistic expectations or some other need is not being met and taking it out on their children is the easiest and safest thing for them to do.<br /><br />I've long felt that our culture doesn't truly like or appreciate children and so child bashing is acceptable in many places. At the same time, my own mother was so miserable as a mom when I was an infant she attempted suicide. No one would help her because they insisted that motherhood was supposed to be so wonderful every minute of the day, she felt horrible for not being "perfect" at it. <br /><br />Maybe these women on Oprah rant about their children because their children show them themselves and they don't like what they see. I know I've felt that my son has revealed my inadequacies plenty of times. <br /><br />If Oprah really wanted to be helpful (and maybe she did this--I don't know), she'd help these women get at the real reason they're complaining.<br /><br />Glad I found your blog.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9684236.post-90190006536955688182009-04-27T17:37:00.000-04:002009-04-27T17:37:00.000-04:00I posted this same post to my brave writer blog as...I posted this same post to my brave writer blog as well. It's wonderful seeing the homeschooling community weigh in with their comments. I shared the following in response to them and wanted to share it here too. (I also want to say: I think Dads could write their own passionate defenses of fatherhood!)<br /><br />--<br /><br />I love all your comments! I was thinking today at our homeschool co-op how when you have babies, you move from obscurity to rock star status everywhere you go. I remember the curious gazes, the constant flow of admiration for my kids’ curly hair, the praise and validation for doing such an important job (raising kids and homeschooling them too!). Despite the assumption that mothers don’t get enough appreciation, I’ve found that now that my kids are older and not with me, I become invisible in public. With children alongside me, I enjoyed praise, support, enthusiasm and kindness from perfect strangers every single day.<br /><br />My job now, in my late forties, is to shower those young moms with the same admiration and sweetness shown to me back in my thirties.<br /><br />Congrats to all of you!<br /><br />--<br /><br />Thanks for contributing to the discussion!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00088119765077193302noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9684236.post-43301776125622425702009-04-27T17:29:00.000-04:002009-04-27T17:29:00.000-04:00Well said. Our kids are teens, and as a dad, I mis...Well said. Our kids are teens, and as a dad, I miss the years that have passed. Would not trade them for anything.Watchmanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16074753807595569032noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9684236.post-6892211717967770342009-04-27T17:21:00.000-04:002009-04-27T17:21:00.000-04:00Thanks so much for this post. You beat me to it! I...Thanks so much for this post. You beat me to it! I have spoken to a few mothers about this particular Oprah show and, oh no, don't get me started again. I was sickened by the whole tone of the show. I have been an Oprah fan since the beginning but I was so disappointed in this portrayal of motherhood. I raised 3 kids who are now responsible, independent adults with entrepreneurial spirits and good morals and values. I was a stay at home mother who loved being a mother, who put her life on hold because when I made the choice to have kids I told myself that I would dedicate my life to those kids to my fullest potential. Shame on those who complained about way too many things where they could have found joy. <br />The more frightening thing to me though, is how their kids will perceive mothering. <br />I am writing an email to the Oprah Show to vent because I think it's really necessary in this case. She has way too many viewers who have now been given permission to "give up" because it's just too inconvenient.Moira Phttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00769515445715983527noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9684236.post-30713311923863974432009-04-27T15:58:00.000-04:002009-04-27T15:58:00.000-04:00if motherhood is as awful as these moms on Oprah d...if motherhood is as awful as these moms on Oprah described why would anyone do it? If that was all there was to it one would have to question their sanity.<br /><br />I am glad Julie you are able to view from a different perspective...a (very) early Happy Mother's Day to you and other mothers who can see the joys through the challenges!Mikehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05781572223772781855noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9684236.post-43035154570707092372009-04-27T15:26:00.000-04:002009-04-27T15:26:00.000-04:00Thank you for this. I completely and totally agree...Thank you for this. I completely and totally agree. I think there's a fair amount of one-upping that goes on, with mom bloggers who each want to relate the most awful experience, and "confess" their own dissatisfaction and angst. Even if it's said in jest or hyperbole, it still will have an effect on those children. Those women should be ashamed.Lydia Netzerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11448861273955788158noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9684236.post-66311301587764120672009-04-27T15:18:00.000-04:002009-04-27T15:18:00.000-04:00This is great! My days aren't always rosy with the...This is great! My days aren't always rosy with the little ones and I do find my life is sometimes so full of them that I forget "me", but as overall, I wouldn't trade a second of their life to recapture what was once my own.Kimberley Nashhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15733191580412713685noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9684236.post-89279458832821454622009-04-27T14:11:00.000-04:002009-04-27T14:11:00.000-04:00There is definitely too much emphasis on the not s...There is definitely too much emphasis on the not so great parts of parenting right now. A scary trend, if you ask me.<br />I love how you described falling asleep with your baby. There truly is nothing better.Sarah @ Ordinary Dayshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07648737299312057118noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9684236.post-36643383021482865712009-04-27T13:31:00.000-04:002009-04-27T13:31:00.000-04:00Beautiful post. Fatherhood has its own special re...Beautiful post. Fatherhood has its own special rewards, but nothing can compare to the tremendous bond that a mother and child will always share. Your kids are blessed for many reasons - the latest being that you took the time to set Oprah's record straight. Of course, kids know everything, so I'm sure what you told them came as no great surprise:-)NoVA Dadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16661990626635939447noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9684236.post-76953203219480204872009-04-27T13:27:00.000-04:002009-04-27T13:27:00.000-04:00Nothing is all roses, but motherhood is one of the...Nothing is all roses, but motherhood is one of the best gardens I have ever known. Thanks for making sure your kids know that their mother loves being a mother.HippieLunatichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16111928618695607271noreply@blogger.com